“I am sorry…”

I am sorry,

that I let it get this far

I am sorry,

for all things that left a scar

 

I am sorry for… 

The wounds of the heart that don’t ease quickly

The way I yelled when I misunderstood, tempered, it was unlike me

The illusion that this would end well, kidding ourselves, we knew the pending results

The turmoil of a family, chipping away trust like it was layered paint, a mess I’m not proud of

The tears, no matter how many apologies, I don’t deserve forgiveness

The guilt, it poisons the mind, making perception unclear 

The fear, that a mistake made would be a world unraveling

The hope, that I could be an answer – when I really was just the problem

The heart ache; selfishly making nothing into something – a fool I am

The kiss, I would take it back, and let it be purely emotional

The time machine, for it was a hopeless wish, one we can only dream of

 

What I am not sorry for…

The sounds of laughter that made everything else feel less important

The late night talks that kept us sane when the world felt chaotic

The smile I wore, it was genuine and real, the way you saw me

The good in me, you saw it when nobody else did, lifting me up when I was down

The inspiration, created by the passion instilled in me but found through those eyes

The church, a leap of faith I was looking for – but could never muster doing alone

The moments, because they will always be cherished

The time machine, for it was what made me keep dreaming that it could all just be perfect… 

 

I am sorry,

that I let it get this far

I am sorry,

for all things that left a scar

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